Category: My Writing Adventure

Here we are again. Celebrating another year, celebrating my birthday! Getting older, going grey, remembering my mortality. Realising time goes by in a flash and pondering where it all went.

Surely it doesn’t have to be so maudlin! It’s a celebration after all. I’m celebrating being alive, being happy and on the whole healthy. Perhaps this shouldn’t be called a birthday! Perhaps it’s the day we choose to have a celebration of life. An annual celebrating life day!

Maybe we could forgo the numerical aspect of it entirely. Do we really need to count up to the day we part this world. Wouldn’t it be nice to say, “It’s her celebration of life day today. Let’s celebrate with her.”

Now think once you put this day of your birth in the context of a celebration of life then surely every day is worth celebrating because there are no dates of the year where at least several thousand if not millions of humans are celebrating life.

I’m not advocating removing the idea of a birthday; perhaps just modifying the concept. It’s nice to have an annual reminder of  the start of life’s journey and the opportunity to stop and contemplate.

Surely though in this life of constant noise and motion having time for ourselves should not be restrained to special occasions. Shouldn’t we acknowledge everyday the beauty of the world around us.

As I’ve moved through my forties I have felt blessed by the life I have had so far. I have accepted I will not be here at least not in this form forever. I am learning and it does take constant practice, to cherish and recognise the moment. Knowing this has given me great peace.

I accept that I am responsible for all the decisions I have made and have yet to make and the consequences of those decisions. Knowing that my body will not survive for ever holds little fear for me as long as I remain in the moment and celebrate the present.

So yes today I am celebrating my birthday and with it my life, the life of  my family and friends and the life of every living thing on this glorious planet that we call home. I feel gratitude for each day and feel wonder at the universe that surrounds us.

Thank you for celebrating life with me today and I look forward to celebrating  life with you tomorrow.

Namaste

Having spent the Summer in a state of flux, believing that perhaps writing wasn’t for me, I find myself in a new role (be it temporary at present), still with links to education but not at the coal face. It’s challenging, requires me to exercise my writing and listening skills and involves supporting and helping others. Working a slight shift pattern is advantageous allowing me to factor in the exercise I enjoy into my daily life and I am able to see how I can start to make time to write. The motivation and self belief is returning, as is the passion to write for pleasure.

I’ve been able to draw my inspiration from many sources. From Listening to the audio book Change your thoughts, Change your life by the late Dr.Wayne Dyer to seeing friends and families achieve fantastic qualifications after overcoming amazing obstacles. I’m learning the pure joy in being and that sometimes we really need to let things just flow. Striving continually towards a goal, even one you are passionate about leads to a feeling of lack of fulfillment when it doesn’t go to plan. Quietening your mind and simplifying your life can often be the key to moving forward.

Enjoying the moment is crucial but often very difficult as our mind wanders to ideas both past and future. That is probably why having a dog has made such a difference. With teenagers/ young adults at home, it is easy to slip into lazy ways as their need for you changes. But a dog must be walked and fed! What you get in exchange is unconditional love and companionship and a feeling of being important in the life of another as you help your offspring achieve their independence. Learning not to take today for granted and watching Jasper, our Springer be in the moment are truly the greatest lessons I have learnt to date.

Having finally embraced the idea of making writing a career, I have started to look into earning some money utilising this skill. Now that my daughter’s GCSEs are nearly finished my excuses are evaporating. I feel I have reached a make or break point and a decision is looming.

In my mind’s eye I should now be an international best seller and have completed my writing course. Instead with only a fifth of the assignments completed and undeveloped ideas for novels swimming around in my mind I feel disappointed.

Perhaps that is what I need to stop being complacent and to take control.  Just wishing that the book be written isn’t going to achieve this goal.  Imaging achieving my goal doesn’t mean it comes without a lot of effort. It is the fear of failure that is preventing me from making a more committed start.  The irony is that this feeling of fear will be what precipitates my failure or inability to achieve my desired outcome of being a famous author.

Don’t get me wrong I certainly can visualise me being interviewed on TV and receiving all sorts of positive reviews. I believe it is within my capability to achieve this and yet I feel blocked when trying to move towards this aim.

Again as I write this comment I realise that I am still missing the point.  I need to live as if I have already become a famous author and be grateful for this achievement.  Whilst I do practice this idea it is not in a whole-hearted way. I don’t feel it with every part of my being.  It is a constant battle to silence that tiny voice inside my head which says you can pretend but you are lying.  That tiny destructive voice of self-doubt is like a uncontrolled nuclear reaction poisoning the feelings of achievement.

So today I am going to turn over a new page, pull my finger out, ignore my inner self critic and start crafting the words needed to make my dreams become reality.

Decision Time (Making a Plan)

By the end of the year I will have completed my first draft of 80,000 words and by this time next year i.e June 2018 this manuscript will be ready for submission.

Inspiration can come from the simplest of things and from it many a lesson can be learnt. A rainbow appearing after a shower reminding us of the beauty contained in the light we take for granted. Goslings on the canal reminding us of the continued circle of life.

Taking my lovely Springer Spaniel for a walk is my daily treat. Watching him bound up and down our local tow paths with joyous abandonment, living in the moment, enables me to put things into perspective.

Sharing your life with an animal who lives only in the present is an amazingly cathartic experience.  Watching nature on a daily basis provides sucker for the soul.

Take today, for example, as I watched in amazement as the family of geese left the safety of the opposite bank of the canal and entered the water.  Normally they would be protective of their young especially in the presence of an over exuberant adolescent gun dog. This morning it was as if  I was watching the adults teach their youngsters a lesson in how to deal with the canine species.

They paraded as a group up and down the water, whilst Jasper appeared almost oblivious to their presence perhaps recognising a need to be a little more gentle around the youngsters. There was an unspoken agreement that these babies needed to understand the rules between these two species and where the safest place to be could be found.

Lesson learnt, Jasper and I started our return journey home.

That’s been my excuse the last 2-3 months.  I haven’t found time to write much. I have entered a couple of competitions but have not managed to submit another assignment since February.

I have however, had time to lose two stone since January and attend various plays, concerts etc.  My priorities have enriched my life and I am glad I have made some amazing life style changes but am also disappointed in how I have spent the past few months procrastinating.

My youngest is also currently in the middle of their GCSEs and this has dominated my decisions over the last month. I am fortunate that I am able to help support my children’s academic studies and have made myself available; often waiting to be called upon. This time spent waiting could have been used to write but I have frittered it away.

I now realise with great trepidation that I am approaching a major crossroads in my life.  College looms for my youngest and the move towards independence. Although my oldest still lives at home, I am aware of the change in dynamics as my children  become young adults.

I need to decide how I proceed from now until I choose to retire.  Do I return to full-time work as a teacher, do I continue with supply work and write (although I am questioning how successful I have been at using this time effectively), do I change career again or throw caution to the wind and become a full-time writer.

I know that I am feeling incredibly jaded at the moment with the education system. Our schools  are failing to support our youngsters with the rapidly changing technological developments that are occurring. The current system is inflexible and not robust enough to meet the needs of our children.

This is leading to what can only be described as dysfunctional relationships between pupils and their teachers. Leaders turn a blind eye to the problems teachers experience with poor behaviour whilst some pupils show increasing disrespect for their educators believing that this relationship is a one way street where they can be abusive and yet blame the teacher when they fail to do well. These same children fail to take responsibility for their actions, often fail to thrive at school even in the areas in which they show an aptitude and as a result will enter the next phase of their life believing the world owes them a living.

Being an avid walker and having explored the local area over the last 4 months I notice this total disregard for others has permeated even into how we look after our local environment. Walking across a beautiful field my husband and I stubble across the remnants of a camp fire complete with discarded bottles of cider and cans of lager.  On entering a wooded area which had been used as a makeshift track for local Scramblers we find a discarded broken motorcycle.

The failure to take responsibility for our actions particularly the impact they have on others including the other living organisms we share our environment with is seeping through our species like a pandemic.  We blame everyone else for our misfortunes. If we hadn’t interfered in this, they wouldn’t have done that.  If the teacher wasn’t crap we would behave.  Blah Blah…….

When will we all realise that we are all creators of our own destinies and that we have the power within us to make the changes that we need to ensure we live in harmony with our beautiful planet.  Rather than blaming others for where we find ourselves we need to make the changes for ourselves.  Believe it or not as we change so will others be inspired to do so by the realisation that everything is possible. Whilst we allow the news, politicians, social media, our peers and families dictate and shape our beliefs then we can never truly experience the greatness within us. Look inside, find yourself and use your amazing skills to manifest the life you want for yourself and the world. If we all work together as one this planet can truly start to thrive again

 

I have always been an opinionated person and that hasn’t changed with age. However what has altered is the fervour with which I express these thoughts. Gone is the anger and the feeling of indignation. Instead this has been replaced by acceptance that not everyone sees things in the same way and that there really is no right or wrong. Just different paths that we choose to travel.

My journey has been coloured by the discovery of the Law of Attraction. Understanding that I am the creator of my own destiny has been truly liberating. It has enabled me to take full responsibility for what occurs and has occured in my life and the choices I make and have made.

Realising the true power that each of us has is amazing.  Working with young people is truly a blessing.  It can be frustrating when they fail to see their full potential but is truly humbling when with guidance they start to take responsibility for their life choices.

Knowing that we do everything from a place of fear or love helps us become more conscious of what feelings are driving each decision we take. Working from a starting point of gratitude enables us to positively move forward in our lives and the realisation that we are all connected brings a deeper appreciation of the wonder of the world in which we find ourselves.

I feel truly blessed that as part of this life’s journey I have had a chance to remember so many important things and I look forward to recalling more as I continue my time here

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So finally I have started to make some progress on writing a thousand words.  I have achieved this today hence the post but not every day yet! My assignment is ready to proof read and send off having taken me only 3 weeks compared to 2 months for the others.

Building a writing habit does take time and perseverance.  For the last 2 weeks the 5am get-ups have gone out the window and yet I have managed to squeeze the time in at other opportunities.

It still amazes me how housework can suddenly seem so much more attractive when I know I should be writing. Despite the fact that I love creating stories and find it truly cathartic I didn’t really understand how difficult it was to make yourself write each day.

I truly assumed that if you loved writing then writing a novel, book etc. would be very easy to do.  You just sat down at your computer and hey presto in a few weeks the finished article emerged.

It is however, a labour of love.  The elusive one thousand words can come quite easily when you spend a couple of days a week on your work. However, at this speed progress can be slow and with no reasonable end point in sight you can understand how some writers end up with a catalogue of unfinished projects.

I am hopeful that I will manage to finish my planned project but that is easy to say when you are just at the beginning.

As well as writing more frequently, I am reading more widely having started a subscription to the New Scientist, to purchase magazines such as The People’s Friend and to investigate different writing genre including Science Fiction.  In addition I have committed to attending a  least a couple of literary festivals this year.

Only time will tell how this great adventure into writing will turn out.  Today I am feeling very positive!

Well since the start of the week I have written one short story of 1000 words which I wrote before work over the course of 2 days. That’s 500 words a day for 2 days.

What happened on the other 2 days I hear you ask. I walked my beautiful Springer Spaniel in the dark with my husband, as we both had early starts and just couldn’t seem to squeeze my writing hour in as well.

But I am back at it now. I have some business calls to make today but plan to devote the morning to study and writing my next assignment.

I want to get to the stage where I am writing 1000 words a day but am starting to recognise that this is a marathon not a sprint. I have limited time and teaching myself the habit of using it wisely is going to take a while. I have lost 3 kg in mass (weight is a force!) over the last week and after 3 weeks on this blood sugar diet have started to develop an understanding of the food I need to eat to enable my body to start burning fat. This is having a really positive effect on both my physical and mental health and has enabled me to be more focussed on the tasks I set myself.

So the aim for today is to write half of my next assignment so that I can complete and post it by the beginning of next week.

 

1. If progress was measured in number of words written since the start of the year then it really has been a very slow start.  As the title implies more of a fizzle than a bang.

But is that truly an accurate measure. Since the start of the year I have recovered from a nasty virus, found time to read a novel and even taught a year 7 creative writing lesson. During the latter I chose to take part in their activity and then shared what I wrote.  The response was incredible and buoyed by my participation many pupils shared their writing. Some already have a flair at writing a thought-provoking story.  It was an awe-inspiring and humbling experience and I learnt so much from it.

I have also changed my diet to reduce my intake of processed carbohydrates, returned to the gym, have started to make progress with the pupils in my Science classes, planned and booked a summer holiday in Croatia and today attended a phenomenal workshop which has helped me focus on what I truly want.

When put like this then the first three weeks of the year have been a truly sizzling beginning to the next chapter in my journey.  I have made a promise to myself to write every morning for an hour starting tomorrow and spurred on by this now feel I finally had something to say in my first post of the year.

The message I wish to convey today is that you must not be so hard on yourself. Acknowledge little successes, even when you don’t believe they add value to your goal or dream, as they ultimately always do.

I could not plan to wake up at 5 am tomorrow to write had I not improved my diet, spent time with great friends and allowed myself time to recover from my recent illness.

Have a wonderful week!